Reality

Reality of life has been hitting me several times in the back and been sweeping of my feet many times in these past few weeks. I am officially 25, if you count it my year, to be honest, I am kinda scared.

Okay la gurau, its not as exaggerating as that haha

Why? And scared of what?

I'm actually scared of not hitting my goals in my life. Many friends and people around me that I know got married and having some sort of huge savings and harta at my age. Looking at those people, I often compared them to myself. Like what are the flaws that I made to make me achieve my goal relatively late compared to others? What are their secrets in having such a good money management? How did they go travel sana-sini at such a young age, as if they have 1 million dollars in they banks? Did they pay their PTPTN / MARA like I do? Didn't they saved money like I did? Did they make personal loans? Did they borrow from their parents? Did they have some sort of high-pay salary?

These questions kept lingering in my head from time to time. At some point, I do feel like how do you made enough money and still manage to buy this and that and still looks happy as if you have nothing to worry. I am confused as well as jealous of these people.

I do plan on getting married and when I look back at my savings, I actually have doubts onto myself. I am not sure if I could pulled it off. I'm not even sure if its enough to pay for the dowry (hantaran) not to mention for the ceremony, the catering and soo on. There were so much things to pay, and when I do the calculation of my monthly savings. It shocked me a little.

It will probably took me more than 3 years to get all that done. I do searched on the internet on how to make a 2nd income, and it does helped me a little. Nevertheless, I am afraid. Afraid of not meeting expectations. I have disappoint many people in my life before but I cant afford to disappoint myself because of my own weakness. How I wish I was a kid again, ya know. Not to worry bout these things, not to worry about anything. 

At times like these, I felt like being in the Marvel Universe, get the Time stone from Doctor Strange and just reverse myself out of time. Hahaha. Would that be cool huh? 

But lets be honest, I would totally find myself abusing the stone from time to time. 

OR

Maybe a reality stone kan, creating money out of existence muahahaha

All jokes aside, I am working so hard in getting to my goals as I planned. I even found some ways on the net that I googled for me to generate a 2nd income that could help me from time to time. I guess sometimes its good to compare yourself to others, just so that I have more semangat to achieve what I wanted. I just hope everything will work out at the end.

Hello 2019

Greetings! Hey guys!

Happy New Year 2019!

Haha I know its kinda late for a new year post but I just felt like this time it is worth of posting. I am just going to recap of my achievements that I did of course. 2018 has been a blissful year for me. Alhamdulillah there were lots of good things compared to the bad ones. However, I still felt grateful because by far it was my most memorable year of all.

In the early months of 2018, I finally found a person who is worthy of my time and effort. I found the courage to confess to the love of my life. ( Glad, I wasnt rejected haha) I found a kind of work position that actually fits my role and personality. I improved my piano skills eventho it is kinda decent. (playing it less now) I found a way of handling and organizing things better. I memorized a lot prayers (doa) and quran's verses a lot compared to my last year. I learnt to keep my cool and keep my patience at a higher level. I observed and study people's behavior and keep a list of ways to handle them (yeah even the most annoying ones)

I advised young people especially my students of general things about life and kept them optimistic. I improved of my time management a little (but still needs more fix on that one haha). I appreciated people who came and left in my life (may Allah bless them all). I watched a lot of Dr Zakir Naik videos a lot during my free time and kinda memorize his speeches when he preaches. ( Yeah, he kinda repeats it during the Q&A session ) I used to speak more bluntly and didnt really care but now I spoke mildly to everybody even to those people who I despise. I spent time with my old friends a lot, while catching up on each other's life. I am also able to differentiate a friend who are true friends and friends with benefits.

I began to have goals of my own to achieve in a certain time period. I was more clear on my judgments and analyse more on mistakes rather than quickly pinpoint on people. All in all, I am 50% happier than I was before. There were much improvement and I was very happy about it so far.

There are one thing that I am kinda concern about and that is my resolution. It will probably be weird since I did a post on 2016 and a post on 2017 about my resolution before this. I actually am not so sure and didn't even plan for a new resolution for the year since this year alone, I already felt like I accomplished things a lot. I guess my only wish is to keep this happiness that I am feeling going on and on.

Cheers to another blissful year ahead of me and of course to all my loyal readers out there!

Autoimmune Disease (SLE)

Hey guys,😁😁😜

Recently I have received news on people whether its on the social media or the news that auto-immune diseases is a thing. Maybe on your country but here in Malaysia, yeah. One of my family members also has been diagnosed to have SLE ( Systemic Lupus Erythematosus ) which is one of the chronic disease within one of the autoimmune disease's family tree.

Lets be honest that at first I didn't know anything about the said diseases until I did some research on it. Systemic Lupus Erythematosus or its previous name, Discoid Lupus Erythematosus is basically similar to most autoimmune diseases but target mainly skins and nearby important organs of our body, which is why SLE patients usually are known to have visible skin rashes on their faces known as (Butterfly Rash) or some other parts of the body. 👀🤔

 ( Butterfly Rash aka SLE )

Lupus came from the latin word Wolf and Erythematosus came from latin word, meaning reddening of skin. 😊😊

It was Dr Cazenave in 1851 that first found a red rashes resembles like a wolf bite on one of his patients, and that was the time the diseases was named Discoid Lupus Erythematosus. Soon after a few years, it was found that the diseases didn't only affect skin but also affect other internal organs and some of our body systems. It was then changed to Systemic Lupus Erythematosus.

Nobody actually knows for 100% that how disease came into existence but some doctors were able to conclude a way or a theory of how the disease can be reduced. Some doctors had different opinions of how this autoimmune diseases are originated. Most of the victims consists of women rather than men. It seems to have a large tendency of affecting women since it has something to do with the hormone, estrogen. Despite that, some doctors thought maybe it has something to do with UV Rays, Hormones, Medication, Eating Habits, Genetics, and even surrounding Environment.

Let us now identify its symptoms..

Symptoms can vary and can change over time. Common symptoms include:

• severe fatigue
• joint pain
• joint swelling
• headaches
• a rash on the cheeks and nose, which is called a “butterfly rash”
• hair loss
• anemia
• blood-clotting problems
• fingers turning white or blue and tingling when cold, which is known as Raynaud’s phenomenon

Other symptoms depend on the part of the body the disease is attacking, such as the digestive tract, the heart, or the skin. Over time, SLE can damage or cause complications in systems throughout your body.

Possible complications may include:

• blood clots and inflammation of blood vessels
• inflammation of the heart
• a heart attack
• a stroke
• memory changes
• behavioral changes
• seizures
• inflammation of lung tissue and the lining of the lung
• kidney inflammation
• decreased kidney function
• kidney failure

SLE can have serious negative effects on your body during pregnancy. It can lead to pregnancy complications and even miscarriage. I would actually wonder as how would those SLE victims, or in this case my cousin felt once being diagnosed to have SLE. Its is so unfortunate of her. I will probably update more of her latest condition soon.

In the meantime, lets us all pray for her safety. Thank you